Oh what a fancy word! Other people prefer the simpler version: growth. One way to discern between INFJ and INFP might be by analyzing the different ways they individuate. Meaning, what paths do they take while growing up?
That seems like a question that shouldn't have an answer, but many experts believe we go through different stages throughout our entire lives as we naturally develop one function progressively after another. It's all about our process toward maturity. As we cultivate each function in turn, we unconsciously seek out "tasks" that will help us to engage and exercise the developing function.
You would think it would be impossible to imagine what that looks like, but it didn't stop Dr. Harold Grant from taking a stab at it.
Let's compare INFJs and INFPs through the four stages of development that he proposes, and maybe it will give you some ideas about what to look for in yours. It is important to note that not everybody develops according to the pattern or according to a precise timetable -- the stages of development below are an idealized perspective of what development would look like in a "classic" candidate.
* * *
1st period - 6 to 12 years
The dominant function for an INFJ is introverted iNtuition.
By innate preference you were drawn in childhood to develop your imagination and creativity. Perhaps you created an imaginary playmate, or several, with whom you secretly lived while your parents wondered about your dreamy silence. Only a favorite friend or two, or a wise and gentle parent, was permitted to share your world of make-believe. Teachers frequently had to remind you that you were not paying attention. It is hard for you to remember the details of this period, especially as details did not engage your interest. But you do recall the general atmosphere, whether of happiness, sadness, pain, or pleasure.
The dominant function for an INFP is introverted Feeling.
As a small child you were intent on pleasing others, and you were probably an obedient and considerate member of the family. Since your feelings were directed toward the inner world, you were likely shy and inclined to spend time by yourself. Your desire to be helpful may have led you to disregard your own interests simply to be of service and to win praise. You may have developed a delicate conscience, leading perhaps to feelings of guilt over inconsequential matters. And you may have felt an obligation to keep harmony in the family, taking responsibility for any failure to maintain it.
2nd period - 12 to 20 years
The INFJ's auxiliary function, extraverted Feeling, usually starts to develop now.
While continuing to perceive in a predominantly intuitive way, you now become aware of a desire to give expression to your life of feeling. Sensitivity to your own feelings and compassion for others became characteristic of you, and because you were led to manifest these qualities others came to know you predominantly through them. You perhaps surprised yourself by becoming more outgoing, in contrast to your previous shyness. You became more aware of ways in which you could help others, especially the poor, the suffering, the underdog, and you may have joined groups committed to the service of others. You may have found it difficult to find time for yourself in the process of obliging others.
The INFP's auxiliary function, extraverted iNtuition, usually starts to develop now.
About the age of twelve you turned to the life of imagination, which you tended to exercise in the company of others, where your best ideas came to you. Though you still retained the deep tendency to spend time alone, particularly in the cultivation of your feelings, during adolescence you found more satisfaction than before in being with others, especially when something exciting was in prospect. Your developing creativity led you to conceive ever new possibilities, more imaginative ways of doing things, and shaping plans for the future. You probably found yourself daydreaming, forgetful of details, disinterested in specifics, but more concerned for the essence and the potential of things than for their actuality. You may have found it difficult to be efficient and precise in handling your belongings, though you may have been able to keep enough in touch with the practical for the pursuit of your projects.
3rd period - 20 to 35 years
The tertiary function for INFJ, introverted Thinking, typically develops next.
At twenty you experienced a tendency to become more independent, more your own person, and became critical of your previous habits of submission tot he wishes of others. Because this development was taking place in an introverted way, you were not fully able to explain to others your new determination to become more autonomous; hence others may have been offended or baffled by the change in you. At the beginning of this period you probably felt you were handling the transition badly, but your conviction that it was right helped you to persevere and grow. The solution to your occasional ineptness was, you believed, in going forward toward assertiveness, not back to your earlier submissiveness.
The tertiary function for INFP, introverted Sensing, typically develops next.
At twenty you felt ready for and even excited about dealing with the world of the senses in new ways. Having made your excursion into the outer world during the preceding period, you now turned within yourself for this cultivation of the sense life. You enjoyed the world of nature without having to share it with others. You may have become interested in making things with your hands, listening to music, collecting and classifying objects. Facts may have assumed more importance to you than before. Your own image in the outside world became more important to you, and you were more sensitive to how others saw you and how you related to them.
Since the last function is opposite the dominant function, people sometimes make dramatic shifts in their personality -- what is sometimes labeled a "mid-life crisis" -- during this phase of development. They may become radically different persons from how they were in the past, although this will not necessarily be so if has been able to embrace change along the way and have individuated previously in a healthy fashion. The fourth function usually develops sometime after age 35.
4th period - 35 to 50 years
The INFJ's fourth function is extraverted Sensing.
At this point you begin to experience a call to develop your least acknowledged gift, your sensing. Now you began to notice the details of life around you, which previously, in your basic preference for exploring the possible, had not engaged your interest. As if for the first time you took pleasure in the exercise of some or all of your senses. You probably became keenly interested in such things as doing things with your hands, playing a musical instrument, taking up a craft, or collecting and classifying objects; and you engaged in this type of activity with a precision which contrasted strongly with your previous vagueness about the life of the senses. Now in fact you became somewhat impatient with inexactitude, daydreaming, and disorder in yourself and in others. Your preference now was for engaged in the newly found life of the senses in company with others, not in solitude. You liked to have someone with you as you attended concert or visited museums; and your companions were struck with your attentiveness to the fine details of artistic creation.
The INFP's fourth function is extraverted Thinking.
Now you began a discomforting and awkward period, as you were drawn despite yourself toward assertive behavior. Because for the greater part of your life your feelings had taken primary responsibility for your decisions, it was somewhat unsettling to deal with life with more detachment and not from any desire to please or to create harmony around you. You yourself and others were sometimes surprised when your hostile or aggressive behavior signaled your slow ascent to assertiveness. At times you may have experienced rebelliousness and resentment over your previous submission to domination by others. You were determined to withstand threats to your new freedom, even though you were not entirely happy about the vigor with which you did this. This was also a period of questioning in your life, as you became less vulnerable to the criticisms of others and more forthright in expressing your own. Your new attitudes were manifest to others.
The timing of these stages varies with the individual. Some develop their dominant and auxiliary functions clearly and reliably by their early twenties; others may find it a much slower process. Some will reach the traditional midlife period and find that they have not, for various reasons, developed one or both of their preferred functions.
For most people, midlife transition takes place between 35 and 50 years of age. However, some are plunged into premature midlife reassessment by a divorce, job loss, serious illness, or the death of a relative or friend. Some people don't seem to go through a midlife transition, but rather experience a burst of growth toward the end of life.
* * *
Once all four of the main functions have developed (or "individuated"), it's anybody's guess what happens next. Some people believe we proceed back through the pattern "backwards," while others say we start over at the top but in the opposite attitude and work from there.
Whichever way it works, the consensus appears to be that, if we live long enough, we will eventually develop all eight of the processes and become fully individuated.
In the meantime, which one of these descriptions feels more like you? Can you match your own history to one of them?
Excerpts taken from From
Image to Likeness: A Jungian Path in the Gospel Journey
by W.
Harold Grant, Thomas
E. Clarke, Mary
M. Thompson
