First, the backdrop.
Carl Jung coined the term "complexes."
Complex
(From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)In psychology a complex is generally an important group of unconscious associations, or a strong unconscious impulse lying behind an individual's otherwise mysterious condition: the detail varies widely from theory to theory. However their existence is quite widely agreed upon in the area of depth psychology at least, being instrumental in the systems of both Freud and Jung. They are generally a way of mapping the psyche, and are crucial theoretical items of common reference to be found in therapy.
The term "complex" was coined by Carl Jung when he was still a follower of Sigmund Freud. He described them as being 'nodes' in the unconscious. If a trauma from childhood, say, is still affecting a patient, then the behaviors, thoughts, and dreams of the individual could well still be under the influence of a complex developed in their formative years. Freud utilized the idea in his theory of the Oedipus complex, his most famous (and outside of psychology - infamous) psychological formulation. Once Jung broke from Freud and the two men went their own ways, forming their own disciplines behind them, there was briefly a movement in some of Freud's circle to remove all of Jung's work and terminology from their school of psychoanalysis. Freud himself however refused, and so the name 'complex' stayed.
Proposed psychological complexes:
Freudian: Oedipus complex
Jungian: anima animus puer senex
Other: Inferiority complex Napoleon complex
According to Jungian psychology as I understand it (which could be a distorted understanding, I admit!), each and every one of us suffers from some kind of complex. In fact, Dr. John Beebe recently stated in a lecture that "being too busy" was a complex! (Do we see an epidemic of that?) So we all have a complex arrangement of complexes in our personalities.
Further, as mentioned above, there is a special complex that has received a great deal of attention: the inferiority complex.
In the fields of psychology and psychoanalysis, an inferiority complex is a feeling that one is inferior to others in some way. It is often unconscious, and is thought to drive afflicted individuals to overcompensate, resulting either in spectacular achievement or extreme antisocial behavior. Early work was pioneered by Alfred Adler, who used the example of Napoleon complexes to illustrate his theory.
Now our fourth cognitive process in the hierarchy of our personality is commonly known as the "inferior" function. It's the function that is ego-syntonic, but is mostly or entirely (depending on who you speak to) in the unconscious.
According to Dr. John Beebe, this inferior process is where we experience an "inferiority complex." What he means is: while we aspire to using our fourth function well, we are uncomfortably conscious of the fact that we are inferior in its use, and we know on some level that we must compensate whenever we use it. We are distressingly aware that we can easily screw up around this process in a big way, and are very sensitive to criticism. Whenever we attempt to access it consciously, we know it's an area where we lack skill, and are disquieted by our own inferior use of it. Altogether, this complex tends to "make too much of things."
SO!
What does that mean for INFJs and INFPs?
Let's start that investigation by looking at which cognitive processes show up in the inferior position in both codes. For the INFJ, extraverted Sensing shows up as the inferiority complex, and for the INFP, extraverted Thinking shows up as the inferiority complex.
Now for some anecdotes to describe some ways this complex manifests. (Before you read them, you may wish to stop and briefly consider how your fourth process might show up as your inferiority complex so your self-knowledge doesn't get tainted by what comes next.)
As an INFJ, I feel amply qualified to share an example of my inferiority complex around extraverted Sensing.
Last summer I was invited to attend my high school class reunion. Agh! All the stresses and anxieties of such an event! And my need to be competent with extraverted Sensing showed up in a big way. First of all, a driving need to get my body in *perfect* shape suddenly expressed itself. I needed my physical self to look svelte so I would make a big impact! (Move over, Pamela Anderson.) So, unlike my normal self, I took up swimming (obsessively, every single day), ate little other than fresh fruits and vegetables, and did most everything I could think of to make my body more closely resemble the body that graduated from high school.
THEN I took that a step further. I required the perfect clothes! I panicked that I didn't have the "right" outfit to wear to this event! It's embarrassing to admit, but I dropped hundreds of dollars on mail-order garments. I shopped the fashion catalogues, picking out one outfit after another that might make the impression I craved. Naturally (this being my inferior and all), I couldn't quite decide on the style, the cut, the precise look I wanted! My use of the process just isn't that skillful!
I didn't want to "stick out," but I didn't want to be lost in the crowd either. So I spent and spent and spent. When the time came to pack, it took two big suitcases to hold all the clothes I purchased. (Mind you, this event was one dinner one evening in one small town. Can you believe it??) I lugged all these clothes home so I could be in the same location as the event and get my mom's help making a decision about what to wear. I could also plan according to the weather, and I even sneaked a peek at the restaurant ahead of time so I'd be familiar with the setting. (I bet my dad was laughing his butt off.) Did I mention we rented a convertible to arrive in? We were big show-offs!
I admit I realized early on that I was in the grip of something (about the third day of swimming), and I chose to give myself space to be with it instead of fighting it. I didn't have it -- it had me! And... I had the luxury of giving into it. Luckily I am blessed with a wonderful, supportive husband who didn't embarrass me around my complex.
So here's the punchline: I wore something old. No kidding! I ended up wearing an outfit bought several months previously. I ended up shipping back nearly every thing I had bought via mail order. (I'm still scared to look at what I paid in shipping costs.)
Was I overcompensating or what?!? Honestly, all this fuss for maybe 6 hours of my life with people I never see anymore!
This is what I wore. (You can laugh -- I realize it's a letdown after so much build-up. Hey, I'm congratulating myself that I didn't get stupid and wear my Oscar dress!)
I was in a class this past weekend, and we talked about the part of me we called the "Ta Da Child." She's the one who's the
show-off. She likes showing off! She wants to be noticed and applauded.
She's all about making an impression. She wears sparkly skirts and fun shoes and shiny jewelry. Often when she appears, the effect is one of "Ta da!!!!" -- just like the pretty girl in the magic
act who jumps out of a box in a spangly outfit.
And here's the crazy thing: whenever I would go out on acting auditions or do things where people were studying my looks, I wanted to die. I was soooooo self-conscious! I always felt like "I'm not pretty enough," "I'm not good enough."
"They're noticing how ugly I am." I wanted to crawl under the
chair and hide. Particularly for auditions when they videotaped me, I was always
self-consciously thinking the camera picked up every wrinkle, my teeth were
dingy, there were acne scars on my face, my hair was drab. I couldn't turn off this internal critic that would pick pick pick at me and tell me how unattractive I was! And of course this critic KNEW everybody else
who was auditioning looked prettier, better dressed, more charming, more attractive. And I would do myself in time and time again in these situations. I always felt like I made a fool of myself by entering
a Junior Miss Pageant in high school; I was a target for scorn when I tried out for the modeling squad in college.
It's a funny disparity -- on the one hand I typically receive more than my share of compliments from people when I
step out in public (the showoff Ta Da Child!), and yet I have a dreadful inferiority complex about my looks.
My internal critic tells me I'm a hideous hag, and I'm always trying to
compensate. And yet I am perpetually attracted to
acting/auditioning, modeling, showing-off! It's danged if I do,
and danged if I don't. Naturally, I don't take the easy way out by
just avoiding those situations -- no, I am attracted to them like a moth
to the proverbial flame.
Now I need to emphasize here that my inferiority complex showed up around my appearance, but it also shows up around my accomplishments. It's about wanting to impress people. Other INFJs may experience their inferior in different ways related to their extraverted Sensing. Some INFJs express their Se through art, decorating, dancing, writing, or music, to name a few--so don't assume every INFJ is going to express their inferiority complex through what they wear. It often does have something to do with appearances, however -- looking good or showing off!
Time to shift gears.
Not having INFP preferences, I don't have as much light to shed on the inferior use of extraverted Thinking, although I addressed it on a previous page. I do know that INFPs I've talked to generally have an awareness that they have and use Te. I see the Te show up with INFPs in joining "debate squads" (Te "rearranging people's thinking"), and I sometimes see it with an interest in Chess. And I seem to encounter a lot of INFPs and ISFPs romantically involved with lawyers and extraverted Thinking types, so the attraction is certainly there!
For instance, one INFP wrote to say:
Yesterday, my wife and I were cleaning the house together for a
while. And at one point she said, "You're using the wrong cleaning
product." That led to a little, light argument; I insisted that I
wasn't *wrong* but was just using a *different* product than she
would have preferred. I don't know if she ever got what I meant.
But then I reflected on my inferior Te. One thing it may mean is
that I tend to be sensitive about being called wrong. Because as a
matter of fact, I often am wrong. I make mistakes, and I can be
downright illogical. But because I know that, and because I'm
sensitive about it, I try especially hard to *avoid* making mistakes
of that kind. And when someone points out one of my mistakes, I
freeze and get apologetic or defensive.
I'm also timid about doing anything that might involve Te. Playing a
game like chess, for instance. I used to know an International
Master, and I had him up on a pedestal. Not only did I envy him, but
I didn't dare speak about chess around him, because I felt unworthy.
He wouldn't have minded at all, I'm sure; and he'd no doubt have been
more than happy to play a game or two with me, for that matter.
Because Te was surely *not* his inferior function. To him, it was
natural and no big deal. I was the one who made a big deal of it.
Yet in the privacy of my own home, I'll study chess problems and read
books on the game and practice (at novice levels) on my computer.
But I get the jitters anytime another person wants to play, and I
usually decline or suggest a different game (maybe one with a chance
element so I can blame my loss on bad luck).
Other times, I'll get into an argument with somebody (it can be on
most any topic), and before I know it I'm speaking like a trial
lawyer in the courtroom or a politician on a debate stage. This is
the "overcompensation" aspect of an inferiority complex, which
results in "exaggerated aggressiveness." I feel like everything is
riding on my winning the debate; I *have* to win, or the world will
be lost. In truth, of course, it's usually nothing but my ego at
stake. But don't try to tell me that at the time; I won't hear it.
Over the weekend, I noticed something else that might tie in with my
inferior Te -- the names I call myself when I'm feeling upset or
insecure or whatever. I was playing a puzzle game on a computer, and
after a while I started getting frustrated when things went against
me. And I caught myself saying things like, "I'm so stupid!" "I'm a
moron!" "I must be the blindest idiot in the world!" Those are the
things I'd be saying when I wasn't cursing my artificial opponent for
his uncanny luck. And they all tie in with inferior Te, don't they?
I rarely berate myself for being thoughtless or unkind or crass or
unprincipled. I may sometimes err in those areas too, but I just
notice and apologize and forgive myself and move on. Perhaps it's
because I know I'm stronger in those areas; I'm not so sensitive
about them. If I make the occasional slip-up, I'll make up for it by
doing well on a thousand other occasions.
But in the area of Te, I'm subconsciously or half-consciously aware
of my weakness, which makes me prone to mistakes and also makes it
difficult for me to compensate sufficiently for them. So I feel I
have to take more drastic measures: try very hard to avoid making
mistakes in the first place (maybe by timidly avoiding activities
where I have to use Te), or else come on like gangbusters and try to
make up in volume and intensity what I lack in natural talent.
Just telling some of my own story in hopes it might prompt you (dear
reader) to reflect on your own.
Often INFPs enjoy planning, organizing, or arranging things -- one of my clients loves putting together jigsaw puzzles! Another will analyze weight charts and use a bathroom scale regularly to achieve her optimal weight. And this is where the inferiority complex around Te will show up. INFPs sometimes become really upset when they don't organize things as efficiently as they would like to. Perhaps they think through the steps needed to accomplish something, and then don't follow through.
In fact, Dr. Berens says that perhaps it is this aspirational use of Te that causes many INFPs to believe they have preferences for "J" rather than "P."
Here's another example of an INFP sharing her "inferiority complex" in action:
> I recently moved from a 1 bed/1 bath
> to a 2 bed/1.5 bath because I wanted a place for
> a den. I was tired of the clutter in my dining room. I had
> wonderful plans for this room, how organized it would be, exactly
> where everything would go -- everyone would finally see how organized
> I am!> I really thought that!
> I moved and got everything in. and
> all but four boxes unpacked and put away (I've moved a lot and
> learned do it now or it never gets done). I had two sets of guests
> my first month here and they slept in the den. And everyone thought
> my new place looked wonderful! I was reveling in how neat, clean,
> and tidy everything was!> Suddenly, the week after my second set of guests left,
> I needed some paperwork out of one of the boxes that was
> left to unpack -- all of the boxes not unpacked were full of paperwork
> I need to sort, and things I didn't know what to do with
> (of course)!> Not half an hour later I had papers, bags of papers
> to shred (which are not shredded yet, 2 months later), bills, books,
> and other stuff spread all over the room -- and it still looks about
> the same, just rearranged when I go looking for something I know is
> there!> I can laugh now that I understand why I'm that way and be
> thankful that a wonderful friend of mine says, "It's not clutter or
> disorganization, it's lots of 'you' all over the place -- it's
> you! Besides you can always find whatever you want, I've never
> seen you really lose anything."
This certainly looks like aspirational Te, but I don't see the signature touchiness and sensitivity showing up here that indicates an inferiority complex is in full expression. Perhaps that signature didn't show up in my reunion anecdote either, but trust me it was lurking. Maybe I need to go poke fun at her messy spare room, and I'll provoke more touchiness than I'd like....?
Dr. Beebe talks about inferior Te wanting to "plan things." I suddenly realized I may be failing my INFP clients by not emphasizing goal-setting and encouraging them to plan more. Hmmmmm... On the other hand, I once challenged an INFP client to deliver me a rough sketch of his plan to accomplish a goal, and I never ever got it. He would promise and promise and yet it never ever arrived.
I do see the inferiority complex compel a lot of INFPs who are often seeking the logic behind things to a crazy degree. Sometimes a cynical attitude manifests from their inferior. In order to "conquer" their inferiority complex, INFPs regularly turn up in technical fields (science, computers, maths) as a way to compensate for an internal feeling of inferiority in these areas, and struggle to reconcile being both "right-brained" and "left-brained."
Where I also notice a lot of INFPs "hooked" by their inferiority complex is when they mis-type themselves as INTPs. They are determined to put the "T" in their code!
It can be uncomfortable to be around someone who is trying to "prove something" in a way that screams they are desperately trying to overcome their weakness. (On that note, my show-off side regularly offends people -- particularly those with extraverted Sensing in their shadow!) Our touchiness causes others to walk on eggshells. And Beebe says we all experience profound shame around our inferior process.
A paradox is created around people aspiring to overcome their sense of inferiority, because that area of vulnerability can never be overcome, no matter how much we practice or work at it. When we try to accomplish things using our inferior process, we display the "strain of the anima" -- in other words, others notice how hard we're trying.
I'm hoping this page sets off a few "ahas" for INF_s, who will then write me with more wonderful anecdotes of aspirational use of their fourth function that do a good job of demonstrating the inferiority complex. It's a rich place to look for INFJ/INFP differences.
